Tuesday, August 23, 2011

bad news

eric and I have been trying to buy a farm upstate near albany.
sometimes things work out, and sometimes they just don't. banks are frugal right now, and they won't grant us a mortgage on the land.

i've been dying to show and talk to you about this for ages now, but i've been superstitious.

i cried my eyes out on the corner of lafayette and bond streets today around 3:30pm. a funny thing; when you see someone crying on the street in the city its seems such a spectacle, but when you're the one crying you just don't care who walks by to witness...

IMG_1452

this farm is meant to be ours. the first time we saw it, after a long drive, i peed on the corner of the barn, marking my territory like a god damn dog.

NOT GIVING UP YET


42 comments:

LPC said...

Boo! So sorry, enlist internet vibrations, reengage...xox.

Desi McKinnon said...

Don't give up it's lovely. You will find a way. I'm sorry that the bank doesn't share your vision. Damn the man.

D said...

Call me. I have thoughts. They don't call me D$ for nuthin'...:)

McKenzie Powell Designs said...

Don't give up! It needs to be yours.

fifi said...

total shitballs, dude. commiserations!

Olivia Jeffries said...

we've been let down several times in our now 6 month quest to find a new home. it is grueling. and you don't expect it to be such an emotional thing either. hang on in there :)

Miss Flying V said...

It looks beautiful, don't give up! I'll be cheering for you :)

xx Viola

sarah said...

so sorry. don't give up. sending you both some thoughts + positivity. xo.

Foundation Design said...

if i saw you crying on the corner, i'd give you a hug. it's so difficult to hear no to your dream. but you'll probably fight harder for it and it will be that much more amazing when it happens. xoxo

Maria @ Scandi Foodie said...

Oh man! I'm sorry to hear that and I know exactly how you feel... I found my dream house not too long a go only to find out it was out of our budget. I'm still thinking about the place, but all I can do is hope something better will turn up. Just keep in mind that 'everything happens for a reason'! x

julie said...

what an amazing place, no wonder u have fallen in love with it - i know how easy it is to become attached to the place of your dreams....don't give up hon - sending u a huge hug from australia. xxx

Splendid Stems said...

Don't give up! Would love you guys as neighbors!

bowstreetflowers said...

It will be yours. You'll find a way. No one else is coming near that barn!

margaret said...

that house and barn look like heaven on earth.

Ann said...

I know it sounds obvious, but will you try other banks?

Sending hopeful energy....

chaffinch said...

Where there's a will, there's a way.

Have you tried an equivalent of the cooperative bank in the UK?

Sending hopeful thoughts.

Julie said...

So sorry...but I'm sure there are other ways to find the money. Have you checked out some various grants for farmers? (Do you plan to grow flowers for the business? That would qualify.) I'm new to your blog--but now heavily addicted to floral loveliness--and there are many loans and grants for farming. We have a little suburban "microfarm"--my backyard heirloom plant business (in a subdivision)--and there are great resources out there if you know where to look. Sorry--you may have already thought of this, but I hate to see you lose such a gorgeous farm! If you're not already connected, check out your local extension agency to see if they can point you in the right direction. We have a fabulous organization in the Carolinas--Carolina Farm Stewardship Association, which is such a wealth of information. Perhaps check for a similar organization in your area. Wishing you the best of luck!!! (And apologizing for the long-winded comment.)

Julie said...

Check out beginningfarmers.org for more info. I just did a quick look, but there seems to be much info for financing opportunities. Good luck! Wishing you the best!

Anonymous said...

if you buy it does that mean you will leave the hook, glorious coffey street and valentino pier? This worries me.

leah said...

It's amazing! Keep asking everyone you know for ways and suggestions, someone must find a way. Or we could all just petition the bank on your behalf. Kill them will bouquets.

Liane said...

i'm sorry sarah. i know how you wanted this. i'm keeping my fingers crossed hard for you.

The Oak Leaves said...

Im in exactly the same boat right now. Im in love with a place in locust grove va with 22 acres a farm house and studio... anyhow, a friend of ours told us to talk to the people at farm credit, to buy the place as land, rather than a home... maybe you should look into that option a well...

im crossing my fingers... But still feeling devastated that its proving so hard to get...

good luck though, it looks like an amazing place!

Sealicious said...

I'm so sorry Sarah, you must be hurting so much right now :(

Have you looked into FSA Loans yet?

http://www.fsa.usda.gov/FSA/webapp?area=home&subject=fmlp&topic=landing

Good luck - I know that whatever happens with your farm dreams, in the end it will be amazing!

studio choo said...

oh hell yeah you're gonna make it happen. we're gonna have east coast/west coast communes.

Belle said...

Your spirit..will is inspiring. Hell your outlook is pretty damn entertaining. Blogs are a weird perspective..perhaps a view, a wish of how our own lives could be. When really our experiences are pretty universal, and life just sort of happens, with a little push and shove. But it's nice we can share all this and not feel so alone in our own.
This is a bummer..a large pothole in the road that gives you a flat (man, i hate those), but giving up is the only way you can really lose. Inflate that shit and keep on.

Jessica said...

Sending lots of positive thoughts to you. I don't even know you and I can tell that farm was meant to be. It has to work out!

Jessica :: Delicatessen said...

Happy to see you are not giving up on your dream and what a lovely one it is. You got this!

Anonymous said...

Don't give up. I almost gave up when I bought my house so many times (16 years ago) and everything ended up working out fine. This is where you get creative.

Anonymous said...

Wow! It's SO pretty. I'd be willing to kick in $10 or $20 bucks to help you buy your farm. And I don't even know you. But I read your blog everyday. Maybe you can start something on kickstarter? And build up your down payment or something?

Pam-housemartin said...

don't give up. sending you good thoughts. so good to see you last week.

littlewinterbride said...

ciao sarah what a beautiful property. keep fighting for it. the ups and downs of purchasing a home is a bitch. we just went through it. i feel for ya.

Molly said...

We bought our first house in February and had a hell of a time getting a mortgage, too. They really put you through the ringer when you're self-employed. I feel tired just remembering it. I think the most important thing is finding a mortgage banker who can give you one-on-one attention and really go to bat for you with the underwriters. So many hoops to jump through!

Fingers crossed for you and Eric...

K said...

oof. The last time I cried in public was at the Glasgow airport while my boyfriend was detained for 5 hours (long story). This sweet old scottish lady came up and rubbed my back and said There's noo need to cry, love.

Hope ya'll get the house without too many more tears.

Sarahbeth said...

There's nothing more releasing that a good public cry. Get it out girl. I cried in a Sears Department store recently - just sat in the corner and boo-hooed.

Get creative and stay determined.

We've dealt with the bank bs recently. I can't even tell you how many times I wanted to chop off ties with my sewing shears.

LPC said...

I have continued to think about this. First of all, bankers are all terrified now. They screwed up so badly in the mortgage market that they have their tail between their legs. That said, they WANT to sell mortgages to those who qualify. They kept trying to get me to refinance, precisely because they didn't know I was no longer employed. Even though I kept paying my bills, I assume they would have freaked out at refinancing when I had no salary.

I wonder, can you find a friend who knows a banker? Can you find a banker who understands the value of (please excuse the jargon here) an extremely well-respected, social media-validated, brand like you have? You aren't just self-employed. You are Saipua flowers, a legend in your own time. I am not really exaggerating.

Pearl said...

You've already claimed it, do not doubt, it will happen, sometimes things work slowly for a reason, doors will open.

Floret Flowers said...

Awww, keep your chin up!
I want a farm so bad I can taste it, but our timing still isn't right. There have been many tears and frustration here too. Bottom line... it fucking sucks!

But I still dream of my rolling fields, turn of the century farmhouse and perfect little life with great enthusiasm everyday!

it.will.happen

Thicket. said...

well shit. if you already peed on the barn though, its bound to make its way to you.

such is the way of the country. hold tight, sugar.

Monica said...

Would love to have you in the Hudson Valley. Fingers crossed!

meglow said...

I vote kickstarter too!! Or you can come garden at our small NJ farm! We would LOVE to have you. Not very many rules, so i don't see peeing outside being an issue!! http://freshandfancyfarms.com/

What Possessed Me said...

Well SHIT. I just not accepting no from the universe and I'm glad you're not either. It's going to happen - you just need someone on your side who has a little pull and understands the brand (as LPC says). I am rooting for you, babycakes.

http://celebrateanordinarylife.blogspot.com/ said...

You peed on the barn - it's yours, NO doubt! LOL!
Have faith; in this economic climate who knows what will happen. You can try again because those bastards at the banks can't just keep refusing loans while giving themselves huge bonuses - same is happening in the UK, don't give up on your dream ...

Been following your blog for a while now - love it!